Number 4. New York Post. Another US scientist-type is confirmed missing, bringing the total to 6. (not satire)
(Not satire.)
This New York Post article from last Friday adds one more name to the growing list of high-clearance individuals who have disappeared or been killed since last June. Each of the now six people in question had government security clearances and were (maybe) engaged in some aspect of nuclear research or missile technology.
The latest is Melissa Casias, an administrative assistant at Los Alamos National Laboratory. In her position, she would have had access to sensitive high-level documents related to nuclear research at the lab.
The list of recent dead and missing scientist-types now includes:
William McCasland, 68, USAF General retired. Research commander, Kirtland AFB, New Mexico. Former commander of the Air Force Research Laboratory, Wright-Patterson Air Force Base, Dayton. (Ties to UAP/UFO research.) Disappeared from Albuquerque 2/27/26. Left his phone behind.
Monica Jacinto Reza, 60, aerospace engineer formerly with Aerojet Rocketdyne. Creator of Mondaloy. a nickel-based “super alloy”, used in connection with rocket propulsion. Disappeared 6/22/25 while on a hiking trip near Los Angeles.
Carl Grillmair, 67, research scientist, astrophysicist, CalTech. Studied distant planets. NASA scientific achievement medal 2011. Shot to death at home in Llano, California, 2/16/26.
Nuno Loureiro, 47, theoretical physicist, fusion scientist, head of the Plasma Science and Fusion Center, MIT. Shot dead at his home, Brookline, MA, 12/15/25.
Jason Thomas, 45, assistant director for chemical biology at Novartis. Contracts with Department of Defense. Remains discovered in March 2026. Disappeared from home in Wakefield, MA, on 12/13/25. Left phone, wallet and Apple watch behind.
Melissa Casias, 54, administrative assistant, Los Alamos National Laboratory. Access to secure nuclear research documents. Disappeared 6/26/25. Left cell phones (both work and personal) behind; they had been wiped clean.
Casias and Reza both had ties to McCasland. One thing I note is that Casias and Reza both disappeared, separately, within four days of each other.
(The other thing I note is that the New York Post and The Guardian do not publish the dates of their older online articles. Drives me nuts. My web interface only says, “This article is more than a month old.” So when the copy says, “his body was discovered last Monday,” I suppose you can take your pick of Mondays.)
Make of these disappearances and deaths what you will. The UFO pundits are already in full alien swing.
Number 3. Matzav dot com. Commercial job opportunities arise for TSA line-sitting.
On to more important matters, like how Donald Trump is absolutely destroying — I say destroying — the US economy by demanding the Strait of Hormuz remain open for peaceful international commerce. (You have to say that pretty fast, and ignore some of the words, to have it make any sense. Nevertheless, that is what I gather from the main stream news.)
The long lines at airports are due to unpaid TSA workers not showing up, which is due to the failure of the Senate to approve TSA funding until ICE quits deporting illegals, which is somehow related to the war in Iran.
I know, it’s pretty confusing, but if you just skim the headlines you can get a clear picture of how you are to believe that Trump is killing the USA.
Never mind the details.
Because all may not be quite the doom and gloom we seem to thrive on.
Important people are somehow reluctant to stand in a TSA line for hours at a time. Like every crisis since Cain killed Abel, this has created a market opportunity. (Where do you suppose undertakers got their start?)
In the current environment, you can get a part-time job for $20 an hour standing in line for an air traveler. If you are the traveler, there are businesses you can contact to be put in touch with a place-holder.
If you are the place-holder, understand you must remain on your feet and shuffle obediently among the crowd. Not too different than big-box retail sales, except there is virtually no training required. But I may be repeating myself.
Once the airport lines evaporate, which they may have done by the time you read this, TSA agents will be paid again — without Senate action, because they all went home so as to not miss Easter Sunrise Service — and many of those line-sitting jobs will have gone away.
So, it may another instance of you having missed the window for easy money. C’est la vie.
And speaking of easy money, this jewel is from Oakland, California, widely understood to be the most financially irresponsible city in these United States. In debt for maybe $100 million — it’s hard to tell from the article — members of the City Council are considering drastic action.
The members’ annual pay is currently $109,000, probably a mere pittance by California standards. The Council has entertained a proposal to base their pay on “market-appropriate compensation,” which probably means making their own paychecks match those for Council positions in San Diego (3 times the size of Oakland) or Los Angeles (9 times the size).
The member’s pay raise required for this would hover somewhere around 100 percent. By the time you add the generous city benefit package, citizens of Oakland (which for some reason is locally called “The Town” — and I’ve been there, and I could actually think of other terms for it) would find themselves on the hook for over $300,000 per council member. For eight council positions, that’s a hefty load to carry.
But with fiscal disaster threatening to swallow The Town, SOMETHING must be done. Maybe raising their pay will fix the problem.
Or not.
Sort of makes me wish I was still on the city council in my town of 1,000 souls. Think of the lifestyle possibilities.
Number 1. RedState. European Kit Kat heist prompts global humor.
Nestle’s Kit Kat, a supporter of Formula 1 racing, has converted some of their chocolate candy bars to “Indy” themed treats. Shaped like an F1 car, I suppose the wrapped chocolate item tastes the same. (Hard for me to tell. Every time I have eaten a Kit Kat, it doesn’t last long enough to register the flavor.)
Maybe it was the Indy racer attraction, but someone hijacked a truck in Europe carrying twelves tons of the candy bars. That would be 413,793 units, taken somewhere between Italy and Poland.
Kit Kat put out a public service announcement admitting the theft:
Official Statement: We can confirm that 12T of KitKat products were stolen while in transit between our factory in Central Italy and their destination in Poland. We are working closely with local authorities and supply chain partners to investigate. The good news: there are no concerns for consumer safety.
Publicity being what it is, copycats immediately jumped on the story.
Dominoes Pizza, Official Statement: We would like to share our thoughts and condolences with Kit Kat following their recent sad news. On a completely unrelated note, we’re pleased to announce we’ll now be selling a new Kit Kat pizza.
Door Dash, Official Statement: Due to a completely random packaging error, we have 12 ton of KitKats in our DashMarts that we can’t sell. The good news: all you have to do is go to your DoorDash app and add like 500-600 KitKats to your cart and this should resolve itself quickly.
Charlotte Football Club, Official Statement: We would like to share our sincere thoughts and condolences to KitKat after the recent news of 12 tons of KitKats being stolen. On an unrelated note, we are happy to share we will be offering roughly 413,000 KitKats at this Saturday’s match against Philadelphia at Bank of America Stadium.
I’m waiting for another remake of The Italian Job, maybe this time with F1 racers instead of Mini Coopers. Except they’d have probably have trouble with the steps.
And thanks for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, April 3, 2026. This has made me hungry. I think I’ll try some Kit Kat casserole next time it’s my turn to cook.
And just a cultural note for this Easter weekend. When you go to church and someone greets you by saying “He is risen!” the correct response is “He is risen indeed!”
Because He is!
Indeed!
Have a good weekend!
