Number 4. ABC 7 San Francisco. WNBA announces listening project to determine what a woman is.
It ought to be patently obvious that the only players invited to play basketball in the Women’s National Basketball Association are women. It ought to go without saying.
And it did, way back in the 20th century. In 1996, when WNBA was founded, no one had to define what a woman was. It was generally well known, since approximately 100% of people who ever thought about it had a woman for a mother. That person was clearly distinct from the person who was the father.
The unfortunate condition where those bio parents were not part of a person’s household had nothing to do with which was which.
But that was in the long ago, in the previous century.
Today, a woman must be defined. This is a surprisingly difficult task for an organization with the term in their very title.
According to WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert, the question of what makes a woman is a “complex and nuanced” challenge. Give us two or three months, saith Ms. Engelbert, and we’ll get back to you with an answer.
Meanwhile, there are two women who want to be drafted to play, because they think they are well positioned for success in the WNBA. Those would be Enes Kanter Freedom and Royce White.
Mr. Freedom played in the NBA, which interestingly does not feel the need to include “Men’s” in the title of their organization, nor to pass judgment on whether women who declare they are now men ought to be admitted to their ranks. Apparently the trans thing only goes in one direction when it comes to a sport where size, speed and musculature matter.
Most recently, Kanter played for the Boston Celtics and the Houston Rockets. Now he has declared his womanishness and is demanding acceptance by the WNBA.
He says if he is drafted by the Indiana Fever, he could team up with fellow girl player Caitlan Clark. He speculates they could be a dynamic duo, where they could team up for a fast-break score and then chest-bump each other, which he could do because he is now a woman.
The other lady in waiting is Royce White, the 6’8” 270 lb power forward from Iowa State. He also played for the Houston Rockets; and the Philadelphia 76ers, the Sacramento Kings, and most recently for the London Lightning of NLB Canada.
Mr. White has been deeply offended that the WNBA has been hesitant to let him join. He attributes that to the fact that they are discriminating against a black female (himself) and has threatened to sue the organization to be allowed to play.
The WNBA in response issued a statement that they “embrace justice, equity, diversity, and inclusion," while going on to reject "hate, abuse, and demonization.”
It sounds like the term “woman” is not alone in needing a definition. Maybe “equity” and “demonization” could also use some clarification.
It will be fun to see where this ends. Except it does not appear to have an end. Ever.
This has got to be a little embarrassing for the International Federation of the Red Cross.
In 2016, a young Afghani man found his way to Greece, sought and received asylum there. Sharif Ahmadzai, then 16 years old, grew into a professional boxer over the next ten years. He was helped on his way by a well-meaning American couple who met him upon his arrival in Greece and invited him to stay while they ministered to refugees in the ill-fated Moria Refugee Camp on the island of Lesbos.
The three—American parents and Afghani teenager—bonded into a semi-family. They apparently all agreed that Sharif was an adopted son, but the legalities of that are a little muddy now.
The Red Cross found Sharif’s success story so compelling that they produced a four-minute animated film documenting his escape from Afghanistan and subsequent success in Greece with the Americans.
However, when the young man was accused last week of murdering a 38-year-old female aid worker and stuffing her body in a suitcase, the Red Cross backed off the documentary plans slightly.
Sharif was captured on surveillance video towing a large roller suitcase through Athens. The suitcase was later discovered to contain the remains of the Scottish aid worker.
The sort-of parents expressed shock and dismay at this development. The now 26-year-old claims the girl was dead when he found her; he only put her in the suitcase and stashed it in a vacant building because he didn’t know what else to do with her.
Although his uncertainty did not keep him from using her credit cards and withdrawing $10,000 cash from her bank account.
Meanwhile, the documentary lauding the outstanding success of a young refugee finding his future has languished. This sort of thing could put a dent in Red Cross donations for a time.
Number 2. CBS Los Angeles. Gang members contract to clean up homeless sites.
You’ve just gotta love a business plan when savvy investors work hard to build success.
Take Ghost Town for example. They are a group of gang-bangers who—in my imagination—were sitting around one day contemplating the future, and how to improve their prospects.
“Think about this, guys,” said Big Thumper. “Wadda we do that we’re really good at?”
“Well,” said Trash Killer, thinking out loud, “We beat people up.”
“That’s it!” shouted Brain Damage, jumping to his feet. “Folks are scared of us! All we gotta do is find some rich people who will pay us to scare people!”
“Yeah!” replied Big Thumper. “And if they don’t scare, THEN we can beat ‘em up!”
Thus—again, purely in my imagination—was born the idea of Ghost Town. The gang, now a respectable entrepreneurial organization, contracts with legitimate homeowners to vacate homeless persons who have squatted next door to the polite folks.
It is the 21st century rebirth of the protection racket. “Sure is a nice place you got here; be a shame if anything happened to it,” has morphed into: “Sure is a nice place your neighbors got there; be a shame if you got beat up for living next to them.”
Police and homeless advocates have taken a somewhat dim view of Ghost Town. One has called them “thug security,” while others have wondered where the displaced homeless go once they are relocated.
Which could be part of the business model: expanding from one neighborhood to the next.
A Ghost Town spokesperson is duly outraged by the suggestion that they would engage in violence or fisticuffs to carry out their business plan. At clean-up prices ranging from $250 to $1000 per month per client, that’s just ain’t how they roll.
They got a respectable bidness here, see?
Number 1. CBS News. Minneapolis broadcasts all 5 daily calls to prayer.
In a hopeful sign that those who dwell in America are re-discovering faith in God and embracing His will, a religious leader in Minneapolis has proclaimed: "…a very simple message, to share the greatness of God and to call people to success."
That sentiment is worthy of the founders of America, but in this case was voiced by one Jaylani Hussein, executive director of CAIR (Council on American Islamic Relations)-Minnesota.
Mr. Hussein’s vision of sharing God’s greatness involves being faithful in public prayer, and to that end, he is delighted the City Council has unanimously approved the use of community resources to announce the Muslim call to prayer five times daily.
Furthermore, Jaylani Hussein explains that this is entirely in keeping with the U.S. Constitution, as it expresses, “the basic principle of freedom of religion,” which is guaranteed to all Americans.
I expect he will keep saying that until his entire community is submitted to the will of Allah.
Years ago, Ayn Rand expressed something very like this in Atlas Shrugged. Her message was: Don’t let them hold you hostage to your own convictions. Basically, recognize that an enemy can dominate you by using your own beliefs against you.
It sounds like the political manifestation of judo… using the opponent’s weight against him.
It will all work fine, if you think Sharia law—not the Constitution and the Declaration—is the right future for America. Because that is where we are headed.
Of the 13 members of the Minneapolis City County, by the way, three are Muslim. My supposition is the other 10 are frightened Lutherans.
And thanks for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, August 21, 2026. Enjoy this summer weather, here in the northern hemisphere, while it lasts. In about two months you’ll break out the wools and flannels and wonder why you didn’t lay in some firewood when you had the chance.
Have a good weekend!
