I don’t know why anyone would claim the world is spinning out of control.
Just because:
the Russian Bear is ready to use nukes,
NATO keeps poking the Bear,
Ukraine is collapsing on the eastern front,
Israel is fighting on two fronts,
a U.S. President is removed by friends but remains in place for enemies;
a presidential candidate faces guns twice;
the southern border has become more a punch line than an actual line;
the worst hurricane in a century dumps 40 trillion gallons of rain,
the Dow Jones is at an all-time high,
gold and silver are through the roof,
astronauts are stranded in orbit,
global shipping has come to a standstill,
a chemical plant blows up in Georgia,
inflation is out of control,
and AI has rejuvenated nuclear power,
is no reason to become faint of heart. Cheer up! It’s time for The Alligator News Roundup! With fodder like this, how could you NOT want to join the conversation?
Number 5. The Gateway Pundit. TURF WAR: Chicago Gangbangers Expected to Wage War With Tren De Aragua
At last, someone to stand up to the apartment complex squatters!
When reports first emerged that a Venezuelan gang, Tren de Aragua, had forcibly taken over apartments in Colorado, one could mark it up to sensational journalism. Gotta print something, after all.
Then they showed up in Texas, and now appear to be moving on Chicago. The approach seems to be that TDA moves into an apartment complex brandishing semi-automatic weapons and declaring themselves to be the new managers. Rent payments are now payable to the gang, thank you.
Now… the south side of Chicago is not known for its genteel population.
One gentleman who styled himself a spokesperson for a local Illinois… er… “boys club…” indicated his belief that Chicago assets are now and shall forever remain under the control of Chicago natives. Not imported Coloradoans or Texans, and certainly not Venezuelan transplants.
This should be interesting. I wonder what role will be played in this flourishing melodrama by Chicago’s Finest? Or by Chicago’s emergency rooms?
Number 4. CBS News. Port strike called at East and Gulf Coast cargo facilities.
As many as 25,000 dockworkers walked off the job and took positions in picket lines from New York to Houston this week. The International Longshoremen's Association (ILA) struck port facilities all along the U.S. eastern seaboard and the Gulf coast.
United States Maritime Alliance (USMX), a shipping industry group of terminal operators and ocean carriers, claimed it had offered increases of 50% in dockworker wages. In addition, they would triple employer 401(k) contributions and improve health care coverage.
This was not good enough for the ILA, who was determined to get their asked-for 77% pay raise.
The Biden Administration released a statement that they are closely monitoring the situation and assessing the impacts. The impacts, they say, are expected to be minimal, as regards things like medicine, food and gasoline.
Nothing really to see here. Move on.
Reports vary on how much the strike will impact the economy; reports I have seen vary from $3 billion per week to $5 billion per day. At those levels, what would “minimal” mean, anyway?
There are some 250 million cargo containers that move across the oceans of the world every year, and every one of them carries about 40,000 lbs of goods. What could it possibly hurt for them to stop moving, for, say, a month? That is something like 800 trillion lbs of merchandise every 30 days, a lot of it headed for your local Walmart.
Or not.
This could be better than COVID.
Number 3. The Gateway Pundit. Electric Cars Explode in Saltwater from Hurricane Helene.
Water conducts electricity, as we all know from old TV murder mysteries involving bathtubs and electric hair dryers. Saltwater even more so.
When the floodwaters rise and electric vehicles, with gargantuan batteries, go submarine, things can get pretty exciting. If this happens to a lithium battery, which is the preferred motivator of electric vehicles, the results can be downright explosive.
Pinellas County (Florida) officials said, “If you evacuated and left an electric vehicle or golf cart in your garage or under a building and you are not able to get to it or move it, we want you to let us know.”
I’ll bet they do.
At least, this is probably a deterrent to looters who otherwise might ransack high-end cars in underground parking garages.
Number 2. Military dot com. Robot Dogs Armed with Artificial Intelligence-Enabled Rifles.
The attractively-named Q-UGV (Quadrupedal-Unmanned Ground Vehicle) is making it’s debut at a test site in Saudi Arabia. It will be an adjunct to U.S. military and allied ground forces, specifically targeted at the growing drone threat on a battlefield.
Since drones are generally thought of as aerial combatants, and the Q-UGV is distinctly a ground-pounder, it is not clear from the article how that confrontation would work out. But I can assure you, if I saw a platoon of these robo-puppies trotting across my front lawn, topped with M-4 carbines swiveling from side to side, seeking targets of opportunity, I would be strongly tempted to vacate the area.
Nightmares.
Which is probably part of the design.
The Chinese already have their own version of the Well Armed Remotely Piloted Engagement Dog. I can hardly wait for the movie.
And — I just thought of this — WARPED (Well Armed Remotely Piloted Engagement Dog) is a far better name than Q-UGV. That Q thing is really hard to type.
They should hire me to write acronyms. Before the apocalypse.
Number 1. The Gateway Pundit. Alligators Swim Through Florida Streets After Hurricane Helene.
Well, this is special!
“In a news broadcast on Thursday night, ABC News warned residents not to venture out in flood waters after receiving reports of alligators swimming through flooded streets.”
Woof-dah.
If you’re listening to this, go back to the email and see the pics.
I’m not sure which is worse, the alligator climbing your front steps, or the robot dog traipsing across your lawn.
* * * * *
Now see there? Aren’t you glad you joined The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, October 4, 2024? I mean, what else could you do his weekend that could get the adrenaline going like this?
And speaking of alligators: For a somewhat more sedentary and much more worthwhile pursuit, consider contributing a few copies of Alligator Wrestling in the Cancer Ward: How a Christian Tough-Guy Survived Leukemia With Gallows Humor, One-Liners and a Praying Posse to our local cancer center. Books are $20 each. You may purchase as many as you like (the $100 5-book bundle is a popular choice), and they will each be signed by the author and handed out to cancer patients and their families at Ascension St. Francis Hospital, Wichita, Kansas.
Give the gift of faith, hope, and humor. Which are not precisely the three things that 1 Corinthians 13 says will endure… but you get the point. I saw a man and his wife on my last visit to the cancer center and tried to give them a book. They had already found it at the radiology clinic waiting room. They said it was both encouraging and entertaining.
Which is just what I would have said to an author. But they were quite gracious.
Click the link just below to contribute books through Via Christi Foundation.
Have a good weekend! If you see an alligator climbing the steps to your front door, sic your armed robot dog on him!
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