Number 5. USA Today. Mexican cartels are diversifying business.
I learned in business school that the way to grow a business is to keep expanding it. This means not only finding new customers for existing products, but also discovering new enterprises with a whole new set of customers.
Hats off to the south-of-the-border drug cartels who are not sitting on their laurels when it comes to business expansion.
While drug trafficking is the mainstay of operating profits, and will probably remain so as long as there are new 14-year-olds in the USA with disposable income, the payout cycle is longer than could be hoped. Immediate cash turnover is the key to increasing profits, both short- and long-term.
That is why certain of the cartels have begun to explore new ventures.
Fuel theft is a promising field with a virtually unlimited upside revenue stream. Considerable sophistication is needed to get the right balance.
Bribery of the right petrochemical managers, precision drilling to install new, untracked oil taps, careful modification of transport vehicles, efficient design of distribution networks, and the ability to back it all up with swift and violent enforcement requires a multi-dimensional management skillset.
Many of the same skills are useful in taking over the avocado industry, a multi-billion dollar plum to be plucked. It’s a good thing young Americans have grown dependent on avocado toast. As soon as that taste changes, this opportunity may recede. But for now, ripe avocados are ripe for profits.
There are 20,000 plants that manufacture tortillas in Mexico. Many ship products across the border for huge income, and leaving the cartel out of the chain can be bad for one’s health.
Chicken, long a food staple in Mexico and a huge export business, is another chance for cartel expansion.
So you see, it’s not just about drugs and prostitution anymore. There is a whole new world of business opportunity for the forward-thinking entrepreneur. Who is not afraid to use force where required.
Number 4. Care Doctor dot com. Connecticut governor ordered to replant 180 trees.
I drove through Connecticut once, and I can assure you the place is LOADED with trees. Still, when the Governor cut down almost 200 of them to improve the view from the patio of his mansion, that seemed a little over-the-top.
The optics (pun intended) would not be quite so bad if Gov. Ned Lamont’s administration had not positioned itself as an environment-friendly champion.
Local regulations made such clear-cutting illegal, and the Gov lost in court.
A formal apology was made, admitting that cutting down the trees was probably a mistake. “I am dedicated to making things right,” he proclaimed, and promised to learn from his experience.
Which I suppose is about all he COULD say.
Now, I will wait for the follow-up article investigating (a) if he really replanted all those trees, (b) what it did to the view from his patio, and (c ) whether he funded the endeavor himself or used state resources to make it happen.
I suppose, since state workers probably removed them while on the payroll (although I haven’t checked), it would only be right for state workers on the payroll to replace them.
In a certain twisted sense of fair play.
I just love technology, especially the kind that can see what I am doing in great detail from great distances, and that uses artificial intelligence to draw conclusions about my behavior and recommend appropriate fines.
High speed infrared cameras have been deployed by Road Angel in Great Britain to determine whether drivers are using a cell phone or driving without a seat belt in place. The new generation of cameras offers much greater resolution than old ones, allowing the AI algorithm to catch a driver breaking the law behind his windshield with a high degree of certainty.
If you were eating a ham sandwich on rye, rather than talking on your phone, then I am sure those rare cases can be ironed out in court.
Further, the infrared capability makes the new generation of cameras unhampered by having to use highway markers in calculating a car’s speed.
Road Angel claims that more than 400,000 Brits can be caught and held accountable when their new system is fully operational. Imagine the revenue increase, no doubt much greater than the cost of implementation. That makes this project a no-brainer.
And, it is sure to make road warriors delighted that their administration is so intensely concerned with their driving safety.
Number 2. Outdoor Life. ATF cuts firearms suppressor wait times from 10 months to 1 day.
Wait! What???
They should check with the current administration first, before this gets out of hand.
The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms is responsible for reviewing all requests from U.S. citizens who wish to purchase a sound suppressor for a firearm. (Only novices call them “silencers.” These devices do not “silence” most gunshots; they only reduce the decibels to a level safe enough to shoot without ear protection.)
Since the National Firearms Act of 1934, suppressors, like short-barrel rifles, have been available to the general public only by obtaining a federal tax stamp. This requires the customer to file an ATF Form 4 and pay a $200 fee for each item purchased.
In 1934, the $200 was a serious disincentive. Today, not so much. The price in the 1934 law was fixed, with no regard for inflation, probably because the country was on the gold standard at the time, and inflation was not really a thing.
Today, $200 is dinner for 4 at a mid-level restaurant. Modern demand for suppressors has dramatically increased.
The ATF has long processed the Form 4 on paper. A few years ago, the time required to perform the background check and authorize the purchase was in many cases as long as 10 months. The retailer who sold the device collected the purchase price; the customer filed the Form 4 and paid the $200; and nearly a year later the gun store could remove the suppressor from his safe and deliver it to the customer in exchange for the approved form.
Then, along came a new division chief at ATF. He actually decided to process about a hundred forms himself, and discovered virtually every step could be automated. The wait time was cut from 10 months to… less than a week. Most authorizations are made in the same day.
Wow. That man will never succeed as a federal government bureaucrat.
And most importantly, at this rate, ATF will never be able to slow down the gun lobby.
Number 1. Smithsonian Magazine. Tasmania is hiring for Wombat Walkers.
At last! Your dream job!
In an effort to increase tourism, the island state, part of Australia, has advertised unusual jobs for adventurous northern hemisphere types. People rarely visit the land down under from June to August, their winter, so maybe these unique odd jobs can attract fresh blood and new money.
Most of the gigs are unpaid, which could be a disincentive to beginning that new career, but include items sure to enhance anyone’s resume: Wine whisperer, cave conductor, paranormal investigator, oyster organizer and sauna stoker join Wombat walker in the list of open positions.
Think of a wombat like a fuzzy, cuddly puppy dog. The wombat is a marsupial, making it a relative of the kangaroo. The newborns are only a half inch long but grow up to 3 feet in length as adults. They are considered cute and friendly. The job description for the walker includes coaxing the critter out of bed in the morning, and motivating it to complete the morning walk without getting distracted and taking a nap.
So there you have it! New opportunities await! Go forth and go Down Under this summer. But remember to take your parka!
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And that is The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, June 12, 2024. Thanks for joining today.
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